Avoiding Unnecessary Quarrels

A friend recently made a troubling observation:

We often end up in conflict with people we agree with 90 percent of the time.

It’s tragic when you think about it.

These quarrels drain energy, strain relationships, and keep us away from the good God calls us to do.

So instead of cooperating with others in kingdom work, we get tangled up in disputes that accomplish nothing.

God has given His view of this in His Word.

Proverbs says:

“Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man, but any fool will quarrel” (Prov. 20:3).

Paul echoes this when he warns believers to “avoid foolish controversies” because they are “unprofitable and worthless” (Titus 3:9).

Most of us know quarreling is fruitless.

So why do we still fall into it?

One major reason:

We treat “being right” as part of our identity.

So if we think our significance depends on being correct, we feel compelled to jump into every disagreement, correct every detail, and make sure no one thinks we missed something.

Letting something go feels like losing a piece of ourselves.

But if that’s the temptation, the solution is simple and freeing…

Remember where your identity actually comes from.

It comes from being made in God’s image and redeemed by Christ.

This is where true security lies.

In Him.

So the next time you feel the urge to quarrel just to protect your ego, lay it down.

Thank God your identity is already settled in Him.

Then speak and listen in ways that build others up and advance His kingdom.

Keep your cool.

Get Dominion,